PHU CAT, VIETNAM, 1969-1970

During the Vietnam era, working within our confines of military duties we each had lingo of military language that we often used. Much of it was abbreviated or shortened so that it took less time to communicate. We knew what we were saying whether anyone else did or not. The following is a poetic message that is probably best understood by those “who were there”; otherwise it may leave the unsuspecting reader with questions. I could make an attempt to explain some of the jargon but I wouldn’t know where to end it. But I will say that the “Goon” is the EC-47 twin engine airplane built in the late 40’s and still running in 1970.


THE TALKING PHU CAT, GOONEY BIRD, 94TH BLUES

Long time ago, it was last July
Got on a silver plane to fly
Packed my clothes and kissed my Mom
‘Cause I had to hurry off to Vietnam
….’Goin to Phu Cat….. Paradise Acres
…..To fly a Gooney Bird.

Got to the Cat, I was feelin’ low,
Looked all around for a place to go.
Went up to a man and called him Sir,
He said, “Boy, go get a burr!”
…..Haircut that is …..called me a hippie
…..Long sideburns …..sure felt good.

I processed in and pretty soon
I went to fly on the magnificent Goon.
They cranked it up and it started to sputter
That radio talk sure made me stutter;
…..Rrrrrrrroger that …..Sssssstand by one
…..Ooooover and out.

We just took off and begin to fly
Said, “Sir, this is X off to key the K-Y”
He said “Alright, X, go right ahead”.
I said, “As long as I’m up I’ll go to the head”
…..He said “nice Timing” …..I said, “nice takeoff”
…..Roger that.

About feet wet, we had just begun
When I said, “Lock on number one”
He said, “What’s the strength?” I said, “I don’t know,
Got a little spike just beginning to show!”
…..He said “Wait” …..Got to get a Dop set” …..”Pilot, find me a bridge …..
“Or a ridge” …..or a fork in the river …..or a fork in
the road …..Oh, any fork -- I don’t care!”

Got in the area…right on time;
I just locked on to number nine.
Nav said “Slow down X you got too many;
Time to dig into your Box Bennie.”
…..So I did …Hey! Same thing I had yesterday
…..and the day before …..and the day before that
……Man! I got to eat this same stuff again??”
Whatever happened to the IF10?
Had ham and cheese between two dried buns
…And my boiled egg begin to run……
Allllllllll over my water soluble logs
…..One was runnin’ into two …..two into six
…..and six into my maintenance debrief!

I looked at the mess upon my pad
Turned to X and said ‘Hey, Dad!” “Give me a hand”
And he said “No!” “Sorry ‘bout that, I’m the S-R-O
…..Ok, Begger …..18 years and already a Staff

Looked out my window, I saw smoke.
Then the wing fell off and I begin to choke
I said, “Hey, AC, we gotta go back!”
He said, “Our seven hours ain’t up…..Sorry ‘bout that”.
…..As long as you’re up, give me a wing check.
…..I said, “Give me a parachute!”

We came back on a C-G-A
It had been one heck of a day.
The gear was down, we were ready to land,
AC took it to go around again.
Said, “Why stop at 7? …..Why not 7.2?
…..Log us down at 30, Nav!”

Finally got back and stowed my gear
Went to the porch to have some cheer.
Hit the sack and just started to snore
Rocket came in and I kissed the floor.
Somebody yelled “Out going” …..Big Bertha
…..Who’s that idiot under the bed?

People around me started to laugh.
I screamed, “I can’t stand any more of this GAF”
“I gotta leave this doggone place!”
A man smiled at me and said “23 days”
“In the war” …..and I started to cry
…..”350 what??”

Thinkin’ back to the Goons and rockets I’ve heard
And here I am on the Freedom Bird
Goin’ home…..getting’ out of the war.
Ain’t gonna wear the Uni no more.
…..I’m a civilian …..Goodbye, Vietnam!
………..Now what????