I NEED SOME ADVICE.
As my friend and I talked, it became quite clear that we were not on the same page. We were both raised with moral values and love for family. I had difficulty understanding why we were so far apart on core values. My friend was raised in what appeared to be, a normal family situation; two parents and siblings. The parents did expose their kids to the religious experience; attending church on a regular basis.
About the same time, on “the other side of town”, I was also raised with moral values in a family with both parents and siblings, as well. We were not spoiled with too much, nor were we starved with too little; pretty much middle of the road riches, I suppose.
In a recent discussion about moral values and where we stood on certain issues, my friend made the statement that even though we can differ in our thinking, in my friend’s mind, to go and sin, or be with sin, is discounted in their circle of friends. As we know, this is a promiscuous world where a couple living together outside of marriage is quite common. In fact, it frequently occurs prior to marriage so as to “try it out” before the “I do’s” are said.
As we discussed the moral implementations; whether or not this was right or wrong; acceptable by God, or not, my friend’s values seemed to drift towards trying to convince me that God was okay with that. Their circle of friends has the same opinion, so it’s not surprising to hear what I heard. The majority rules….right? If all agree, then it must be so.
The Ten Commandments are certainly not the Ten Suggestions. God doesn’t say “Be Holy because I am Holy……..if you want to”. He doesn’t say “Love your neighbor as yourself…….unless he’s a Jerk!” He doesn’t say, “You shall not have sex outside of marriage….unless it’s with someone you really care about!”
Somewhere along the way, this particular circle of friends has either gotten the wrong message of how to live a holy life, or they have simply compromised their value system and decided FOR GOD how He should rule. It seems to me that tempting God is a no-no! He does make that quite clear in His Book!
Is this really a big deal, or not? It seems clear to me that sin is sin no matter how we slice it; no matter what color we paint it! We can call a Duck a Chicken…. But it still quacks!
So my dilemma is to figure out how to deal with my friend without hurting the feelings too much. I fully realize that God gives Grace to the Humble. Am I “humble” if I continue to commit the same sin? I know He can forgive because he forgave the “Woman at the Well”……although He DID tell her to “go and stop sinning”! What if she didn’t stop??
I love my friend and I know my friend loves me. I really feel like this is a bad sin and my friend is in jeopardy of condemnation. It’s like watching a little toddler walking out towards a busy street between the shrubberies, not suspecting the danger lurking ahead, as I sit in a wheel chair unable to get up and run to get him. It’s a helpless feeling.
So I’m just trying to figure this out.
What advice would you give me??
Well uncle Mike My very first sunday school (as an adult) we had probably 15 couples in the "newlywed" class and one of which was not a newlhywed nor were they married at all but they did live together and I always liked her and she seemed to have good morals but it was one of the questions like what should we say to her she was planning her wedding but it just not happened yet well i was able to do a bibile study with her and several other women in our sunday school class and got to learn a little more about her and when we got to the subject of is it ok to live together before marriage or not" her answer was "No" which i have to say caught me off guard you see she was from canada and her fiancee was from elkcity ok and they met in college (and did not live together) and then decided to move to Ok and she could not afford her own house for the few months it would be before the wedding so they purchased a three bedroom home and that is where her stuff resided I do not know what went on behind closed doors but that is what she said and that is all I need to know I can not sit here and accuse people of anything I can only know what they have told me I grew quite fond of that couple and we ended up being pregnant at the same time (after they married) and everything turned out ok so I learned from that experience in a way I don't think I would have ever learned and here it is
ReplyDeleteJust because it looks bad does not always mean it is bad it goes on an individual basis
and the most important thing is just to keep encouragingif you encourage even the "darkest" most lost people they will eventually with the lord willing turn from there sin and I guarantee you that most christians had a little bit of encouragement from somebody mine was my husband and a few other members of the first baptist church in Elk city Ok!!! as a christian I think it is essential I try not to get in with the wrong crowd but I never avoid them either and I have many friends that do not live the same way that I do but if I was to cut them off or kick them while they are already down what would that do for my testimony or better yet what is that doing for god there is sin everywhere you look I see it everyday but do you stay in your home??? do you not talk to the girl behind the counter???? do you talk to the visitors at church???? all of these people and ourselves included sin on a daily basis I had a pastor in oklahoma that dipped tabacco so is he going to go to heaven???? My grandpa smoked most of his life is he going to make it to heaven I think so!!!! My dad lived a life that I have never known a christian to live do i believe he is in heaven yes I do!!! and I had a baby out of wedlock and have wronged my savior numerous times since then do i know that I will be in heaven yes I do we all make mistakes but condeming us will do nothing for us we need jesus christ's love and whole lot of encouragement we need a good church family and we need a good family we do not need people telling us where we mess up most of the time we can see these mistakes!!!! I have been so very blessed to have knowledge of right and wrong and to know that the consiquences are I continue to study and learn and it is one of the hardest things you could do in todays society everything is backwards and few live by the bible or better we try and change the bible to make it fit into our lives if you look you will find an answer to all of your problems but few even bother with it anymore it is becoming a thing of the past and morals what are those few have them or they are changing ever so quickly but the one thing that we as christians forget to do more often than not is to ask the question W.W.J.D and to love love love unconditionally love everybody regardless of how bad they are messing up or how bad they messed up they need god and we need to let the light shine through if we don't who will so I challenge those who read this (my advise) is to love unconditionally and to cry out to jesus if you are having troubles in your life but we need to stop judging and start loving the first thing i tell people when asking them to come to church is they can come as they are no need to change let god change people that is not are job we are here to mentor and plant seeds only god can actually change people and we can continue to love them and watch god in his work Love you hope you don't mind my advise!!!!!
Christ is the Judge.
ReplyDeleteIntercede in prayer.
LOVE.
Mo2,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the kind words. That is very good advice. I do not sit in judgement on anyone, being thankful that God does that job! It is my job, however, to encourage my brother to NOT sin.
Thanks for the good advice!
Love U 2,
UM